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When the Call Came, His Friend’s Faith Became the Story

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Faith Facts

  • Steve Lackmeyer, an award-winning Oklahoma journalist and man of faith, survived pancreatic cancer after early detection led to a successful Whipple procedure
  • The complex seven-hour surgery, performed by transplant surgeons, removed all traces of cancer — a result Lackmeyer calls a miracle
  • Despite frustrations with organized religion, Lackmeyer’s faith in God strengthened profoundly through his cancer journey and recovery

OKLAHOMA CITY — It’s a call you never want to receive.

“I’ve got cancer,” your loved one says. Not only that, but it’s pancreatic cancer — often a death sentence.




Immediately, your brain goes into a fog.

The person on the line was Steve Lackmeyer, a happily married father of two and one of my best and oldest friends.

Both journalism majors, we met as students at Oklahoma Christian University in the late 1980s. For four years, we worked late nights together at the student newspaper The Talon, covering everything from tuition hikes to presidential campaign rallies.

My junior year, I worked up the nerve to ask out a smart, gorgeous freshman named Tamie. To my shock and delight, she said yes.

The only problem: My brother, Scott, was headed home to Texas that weekend and taking our shared 1984 Ford LTD station wagon with him.

Enter Lackmeyer: He knew geeks like us didn’t land dates with girls like Tamie often. So he loaned me his blue 1986 Hyundai Excel that Friday night. I mention the car’s color because it — like my future bride’s smile and everything else about that night — remains etched in my memory.

Tamie and I celebrated our 36th wedding anniversary this spring.

Lackmeyer is one of the few people who remember that Tamie and I adopted the pet name “Slush Puppie” for each other. From time to time, he still razzes us about it.

One year at Oklahoma Christian, Lackmeyer roomed with David Duncan, now the preaching minister for the Memorial Church of Christ in Houston.

Even back then, Lackmeyer’s healthy journalistic skepticism impressed Duncan.

“Steve always makes me smile because he never takes anything at face value,” Duncan said.

“He always assumes there may be a story behind the story. Listening to him brainstorm those possible angles was a lot of fun in college because nothing was off the table. He would consider every possibility, no matter how serious or absurd. It was always fun even when dealing with difficult issues.”

The C-word

Since 1990, Lackmeyer has worked as a reporter and editor for The Oklahoman, Oklahoma City’s daily newspaper.

He has won numerous awards for his coverage, from the 1995 federal building bombing to the city’s downtown revitalization to its courting of the NBA. He has written seven books about Oklahoma City history and was inducted into the Oklahoma Journalism Hall of Fame in 2022.

If this wasn’t a serious column, I’d point out that Lackmeyer also has done humorous things like — early in his Oklahoman career — offer to take this writer behind the scenes of the nighttime cops beat and then lock his keys in the company car at a gang shooting scene. Suffice it to say that the late, great city editor Gene Triplett was not happy with my friend that night.

But I digress.

Back to the important stuff: Lackmeyer met his own out-of-his-league bride, Wendy, in 1995 and married her in 1998.

The couple later fostered and adopted two abused boys through the Oklahoma Department of Human Services. Their younger son, whom my friend calls “Squirrel” on social media, is now 21. He has developmental disabilities but is the kindest, politest young man you could ever hope to meet.

While Lackmeyer and I are both extremely busy with life and work, we catch up at least every few months over a meal or a movie or maybe a Thunder game.

But when he left a voicemail for me in late April, I couldn’t help but notice the serious tone in his voice.

I called him back immediately, and that’s when he uttered the C-word.

Expired warranty

Lackmeyer explained that he’d been working hard — nothing new there — and pursuing stories such as an “America at 250” piece on the global retail giant Walmart.

His reporting trip to Walmart’s Bentonville, Ark., headquarters for USA TodayThe Oklahoman is a part of its national network — left him feeling extremely tired. He turned 60 at the end of March.

“I guess that’s when your warranty expires,” he joked.

Besides fatigue, symptoms including jaundice and itchiness made it clear he needed to see a doctor.

During the COVID-19 pandemic, he had experienced severe nausea and stomach pain but delayed seeking medical attention until almost too late. The surgeon who removed his gallbladder warned him not to make that mistake again.

This time, a bile duct obstruction seemed to be the problem, and an outpatient surgery was scheduled.

“One theory was, ‘Maybe it’s a stray gallstone that stayed behind when the gallbladder was removed,'” Lackmeyer said.

But actually, a mass — a cancerous one — was pressing against his bile duct and pancreas, the surgery found.

A major reason pancreatic cancer is so deadly: It usually doesn’t cause symptoms in the early stages, as the Cleveland Clinic notes. By the time it’s discovered, it’s frequently too late to treat.

“But that’s not what happened here,” my friend told me.

“Because it was pressing against the bile duct, it gave me an early warning.”

More precisely, it gave him a chance — but no guarantee — to survive, he shared in our initial call.

After that, he began undergoing tests to see if he might qualify for a Whipple procedure, also called a pancreaticoduodenectomy. It’s a complex operation that can have serious risks but often saves lives, according to the Mayo Clinic.

In recent years, exercise and medication have helped my friend lose 200 pounds and drastically improve his physical health. Still, the medical team needed to make sure his heart could handle such an operation.

By early June, he got the official word: His surgery was a go.

“I realize that I’m extremely blessed to have this opportunity … to have a good chance of a positive outcome,” he said as we headed to see “Project Hail Mary” about a week before the operation.

“But there are times when I don’t sleep well,” he acknowledged.

“There are times when I’ve got bad dreams. I’m not going to say I’ve not cried or gotten edgy at times, but I’m trying to be very positive. I’m blessed to have a great group of friends.”

One of those friends — Duncan, his old roommate — called and prayed on the phone with Lackmeyer.

The call happened while Lackmeyer was sitting in a Home Depot parking lot. After the amen, he went to smell the flowers inside the home improvement retailer.

While in the Home Depot, he heard Bob Marley’s “Three Little Birds (Don’t Worry About A Thing)” playing.

He took it as a sign.

Complicated faith

Cancer has a way of making a man contemplate his own mortality.

My friend is no exception.

When I mentioned — before the surgery — that I might write a column about him and needed to confirm a few details, he quipped, “Oh, this is going to be one really cool obituary.”

“It’s not an obituary,” I replied with a laugh.

“It’s a living legacy.”

Lackmeyer believes in Jesus and has been baptized. He has read the Bible “inside and out,” as he described it to me. But he has a complicated relationship with organized Christianity.

He’s fed up with churches on the right and the left.

“You always end up with culture wars and politics, and that’s not what I’m looking for in a church,” he said.

“I don’t know how my relationship with God is helped with a church that is just hateful or judgmental.”

Still, he has faith in God.

Strong faith.

On the day before the operation, I initiated a three-person call with Lackmeyer and Duncan. Duncan prayed again for our friend and assured him God’s will would be done, no matter the outcome. I might have shed a few silent tears on my end.

The June 10 surgery lasted seven hours. Doctors declared it a success. Still, Lackmeyer would need to spend 26 nights in the hospital. And his journey back to full health would not be over even then.

“Recovery is far more brutal (and) slow than anticipated,” he wrote on Facebook a week and a half after the operation.

‘It is a miracle’

On one of my visits to the hospital, I asked Lackmeyer if his cancer experience had strengthened or weakened his faith.

It’s definitely strengthened it, he replied without hesitation.

“You’ve got a friend who two months ago was facing a potential death sentence with pancreatic cancer,” he said, “and now I’m free of cancer.”

That’s right: His doctor informed him last week that his cancer is gone. The Whipple procedure was a 100 percent success.

“It is a miracle,” Lackmeyer said.

“I mean, God has created these intricate bodies that we have, but at the same time, he has provided men of science, men of medicine, to work miracles, to rewire an engine literally.”

“And that’s what happened with me,” he added.

“I mean, the Whipple is no easy thing. It’s done by transplant surgeons. Those are top of the game. They’re removing things, they’re cutting out pieces of organs, and they’re connecting things to work differently than they did. I mean, that’s amazing.”

Definitely amazing.

Sometimes the call you never want to receive has a happy ending.

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The First Baby Born Through Embryo Adoption Shares Her Remarkable Story

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Faith Facts

  • Hannah Strege became the first baby born through embryo adoption, surviving where 19 other embryos did not
  • Her story has profoundly influenced how Christians view the sanctity of frozen embryos
  • Embryo adoption offers pro-life families a way to give life to frozen embryos that would otherwise remain unused

Hannah Strege’s very existence is a testament to the value of every human life, no matter how small. She holds a unique place in history as the first baby ever born through embryo adoption, a groundbreaking alternative that allows families to rescue frozen embryos and bring them to life.

Out of 20 embryos her parents adopted, Hannah was the only one to survive the freezing, thawing, and transfer process. Her survival stands as a powerful reminder of both the fragility and resilience of human life at its earliest stages.

“I was the only one to survive the freeze and the thaw and the transfer,” Hannah shared, reflecting on the miraculous nature of her birth.

Her story has become a beacon for Christians seeking to honor the sanctity of life in practical ways. Embryo adoption provides a life-affirming option for the hundreds of thousands of frozen embryos currently in storage across America, many of which face an uncertain future.

For pro-life Christians, Hannah’s testimony reinforces the conviction that life begins at conception and that every embryo represents a unique individual created in God’s image. Her parents’ decision to adopt embryos demonstrated their commitment to protecting the most vulnerable among us.

The practice of embryo adoption has grown significantly since Hannah’s birth, offering hope to both donor families who want their unused embryos to have a chance at life and to adopting families who long for children. It represents a beautiful intersection of adoption ministry and pro-life advocacy.

Hannah’s survival against overwhelming odds continues to inspire families considering embryo adoption. Her life serves as living proof that these tiny lives matter and deserve the opportunity to grow, be born, and fulfill their God-given potential.

As the debate over frozen embryos continues in medical, legal, and political spheres, Hannah Strege’s story provides a powerful human face to the issue. She is not a theoretical concept or a scientific specimen—she is a beloved daughter, a survivor, and a witness to the wonder of life itself.

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What Parents Risk When They Shield Children From Every Hardship

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Faith Facts

  • Christian parents increasingly prioritize comfort over character development, potentially undermining children’s spiritual resilience
  • Scripture consistently shows God permits struggles to build faith rather than removing all obstacles from believers’ paths
  • Shielding children from all difficulty may prevent them from developing the perseverance needed for lifelong faith and maturity

American parents face a troubling paradox in raising the next generation. While wanting the best for their children, many Christian families have shifted from preparing kids for life’s inevitable valleys to attempting to eliminate those valleys entirely. This well-intentioned approach carries spiritual and practical consequences that deserve careful examination.

God’s pattern throughout Scripture reveals a consistent truth: He doesn’t rescue His people from every difficulty but instead walks with them through trials. From Joseph’s imprisonment to David’s persecution to the apostles’ suffering, biblical heroes developed character through adversity, not in spite of it. Yet modern parenting often operates on a different principle—one that equates good parenting with maximum comfort and minimum struggle.

The cultural shift toward comfort-focused parenting has created what some observers call a crisis of resilience. Children raised in environments where every obstacle is removed, every disappointment is cushioned, and every challenge is smoothed over often reach adulthood unprepared for the realities of a fallen world. They may lack the spiritual and emotional muscles needed to persevere when faith is tested or when circumstances don’t align with their expectations.

This approach contradicts the developmental wisdom found in James 1:2-4, which instructs believers to “count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience.” The passage continues: “But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.” The completeness described here comes through tested faith, not protected comfort.

Parents who consistently intervene to prevent their children from experiencing natural consequences, disappointment, or appropriate struggle may inadvertently communicate dangerous messages. Children may come to believe they are fragile, that discomfort is abnormal, or that faith should produce a problem-free existence. These beliefs set the stage for spiritual crisis when real hardship inevitably arrives.

The distinction between harmful suffering and character-building challenge matters greatly. Parents are called to protect children from genuine harm, abuse, and dangers beyond their maturity level. But this protective instinct becomes problematic when extended to shield children from age-appropriate difficulties, failures, and the natural consequences of their choices.

Consider the difference between a parent who rescues a teenager from every social conflict versus one who provides support while allowing the young person to navigate relationship challenges. The first approach may provide immediate comfort but teaches dependency and avoidance. The second builds social resilience, problem-solving skills, and confidence in God’s presence during interpersonal trials.

Academic struggles present another arena where the comfort-focused approach shows its limitations. Parents who complete homework assignments, negotiate grade changes for work their child didn’t earn, or blame teachers for their student’s lack of effort may believe they’re advocating for their child. In reality, they’re preventing the development of personal responsibility, work ethic, and the ability to persevere through intellectual challenge—qualities essential for adult functioning and spiritual maturity.

The spiritual implications extend beyond practical skills. Children who never experience struggle while depending on God may never develop deep, personal faith. Their relationship with Christ risks remaining theoretical rather than tested and proven. Faith that hasn’t been challenged often proves shallow when life’s inevitable storms arrive.

This doesn’t mean parents should artificially create hardship or remain uninvolved in their children’s lives. Rather, it calls for wisdom in discerning when to step in and when to step back. It requires the courage to allow children to experience disappointment, failure, and difficulty while providing support, perspective, and direction toward God’s sufficiency.

The goal of Christian parenting isn’t to raise comfortable children but to raise faithful adults. This requires exposing young people to progressively greater challenges appropriate to their age and maturity, teaching them to seek God in difficulty, and modeling perseverance through our own trials. It means prioritizing character development over immediate happiness and eternal perspective over temporal comfort.

Parents modeling this approach demonstrate their own dependence on God through difficulties rather than projecting an image of problem-free Christian living. They share age-appropriate information about their own struggles and how faith sustains them. They pray with their children through challenges rather than simply praying problems away.

The cultural pressure to provide maximum comfort and advantage creates real tension for Christian parents. Comparison with families who seem to smooth every path for their children can generate guilt or second-guessing. Yet the biblical standard calls parents to a different measure of success—not whether their children avoided all difficulty but whether they developed faith that endures through difficulty.

Churches and Christian communities can support families in this challenging balance. Teaching that normalizes struggle as part of the Christian experience, mentoring relationships that allow young people to see mature faith tested and proven, and community support for parents making difficult decisions all contribute to raising resilient believers.

The cost of raising comfortable kids becomes apparent in young adults unprepared for college challenges, workplace demands, marriage difficulties, or spiritual doubts. Without the foundation of tested faith and developed perseverance, they often struggle to maintain Christian commitment when comfort gives way to reality. The short-term pain parents sought to avoid becomes long-term crisis as adult children lack the tools to navigate life’s valleys.

Scripture’s wisdom offers a better path. Proverbs 22:6 instructs parents to “train up a child in the way he should go,” recognizing that training involves practice, difficulty, correction, and progressive challenge. Hebrews 12:11 acknowledges that “no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.”

The challenge for this generation of Christian parents is recovering the courage to allow appropriate struggle while maintaining loving support. It requires trusting God’s faithfulness to walk with our children through valleys rather than demanding He remove every valley from their path. It means accepting that the discomfort of watching our children struggle may be the very thing that produces the character and faith they’ll need for a lifetime of following Christ.

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Trump Administration Redirects Millions From Controversial Programs to Family-Centered Education

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Faith Facts

  • The Department of Health and Human Services terminated 53 sex education grants totaling $67 million that promoted explicit content to minors
  • The administration is redirecting funding toward programs emphasizing abstinence, marriage preparation, and family values
  • Critics of the previous programs argued they normalized sexual activity among teenagers rather than promoting healthy boundaries

The Trump administration has taken decisive action to redirect federal funding away from controversial sex education programs that many faith leaders and parents found deeply troubling. The Department of Health and Human Services recently terminated 53 grants worth a combined $67 million, choosing instead to invest in curriculum that aligns with traditional Christian values and parental rights.

This significant policy shift, which received limited coverage in mainstream media outlets during the summer months, represents a fundamental reorientation of how the federal government approaches youth education on matters of sexuality and relationships. The previous programs had drawn sharp criticism from conservative advocates who argued that they introduced age-inappropriate content and undermined parental authority.

The new direction prioritizes abstinence education and marriage preparation programs that emphasize personal responsibility, delayed gratification, and the formation of stable family units. These approaches have long been supported by faith communities who view them as both morally sound and practically effective in reducing teen pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections.

The terminated grants had funded programs that many Christian parents found objectionable, including materials that some described as normalizing teenage sexual activity rather than encouraging young people to wait until marriage. Faith-based organizations have applauded the administration’s willingness to stand firm on traditional values despite pressure from progressive advocacy groups.

Health and Human Services officials indicated that the replacement programs will emphasize character development, healthy relationship skills, and the importance of committed marriage as the proper context for sexual intimacy. This approach reflects a growing movement among parents who want education that reinforces rather than contradicts the values they teach at home.

The funding reallocation also reflects broader concerns about federal overreach into areas that many Americans believe should remain under local and parental control. Conservative education advocates have long argued that Washington bureaucrats should not dictate moral instruction to communities with deeply held religious convictions.

Supporters of the policy change note that abstinence-centered education respects the diverse religious beliefs of American families while promoting outcomes that benefit young people. Research has shown that delaying sexual activity correlates with better educational outcomes, lower rates of poverty, and stronger eventual marriages.

The shift comes at a time when many Christian families feel their values are under attack in public institutions. By redirecting these federal dollars, the administration has sent a clear signal that government programs should support rather than undermine the traditional family structure that has been the foundation of American society.

Progressive organizations have predictably criticized the move, but faith leaders counter that parents—not government bureaucrats or activist groups—should have the primary voice in shaping their children’s understanding of sexuality and relationships. This principle of parental rights has deep roots in both American law and Christian teaching about the family.

Let us know what you think, please share your thoughts in the comments below.

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